Merry Absorbent Christmas!

Well, I hope you're all having a good one.

I've been nursing a holiday cold for a week, but I think I'm getting better so that I don't have to kick in the New Year with disease and phlegm. Other than that, Christmas was okay on this front. Just a nice Christmas dinner with a huge-ass turkey, with my brother, his girlfriend, and my uncle visiting. With so many people, there were a lot of presents going around.

Which reminds me of the Christmas two years ago, when I pranked my brother for his present. He opened it only to find a package of pantyliners. You know, those things women use when they have their monthly armageddon. Only instead of pantyliners, he found a Game Boy Advance SP packed around with tissue paper.

Well, this year, I've decided to take this to a whole new level. I did the same thing, except I left the pantyliners in the package. So my brother got what is advertised in the packaging, plus a card telling him where the real present is, that new Grand Theft Auto game for his Sony PSP. I don't think it embarrassed him at all in front of his girlfriend; I'm sure he understands that whenever I pull off something like this, I have to go buy the pantyliners myself, making myself look like an ass not in front of a girlfriend, but the entire public. It's just too damn awkward to ask one of my girls to buy it for me.

Oh what the hell, like I always say when doing something embarrassing in front of the public - you'll never see any of those people again! And as a bonus, when someone gets inquisitive, I tell them I am indeed buying pantyliners for my girlfriend, thus scoring me "brownie points" for being the boyfriend with the balls to do so.

Well, I sure hope my brother's not too upset about this, because I'm planning to make it a family tradition.

Presents!