Clubbin' Through A Hurricane
Thinking that worst of Hurricane Dennis is past us even though its rainy "tail" is passing over us, me and my friends decided to celebrate at South Beach. My exquisite, yet cloudy evening began with a $35 all-expenses-included "Greek sampler" feast at Taverna Opa. Besides the usual dancing on the tables, throwing napkins, and smashing dishes, a highlight included a bizarre little waiter who insisted that the girls drink their ouzo on his lap. (An ouzo is a shot of an apparently Greek spirit which is best described as colorless Jägermeister.) Then what occurred is a sign that things will go to hell in the near future.
A classmate of mine brought a friend of his along, and the two of them decided to run through the "Ouzo List". For those of you who've been to Opa, on the wall at the back of the place hangs a sign that, just for fun, describes the effect of each subsequent ouzo that you down. From "The first ouzo brings you happiness." to "You better drink the tenth ouzo quickly because the police are coming!" In other words, the two of them are going to try to down TEN shots of ouzo!!
After six shots, my classmate was stumbling around piss-drunk and incessantly dropped cash when the time came for the check (I had no problem with that. He has a job and I don't!). His friend, after eight shots, was unusually well-composed. We left Opa and decided to take our chances getting into Privé, a really posh nightclub which is part of the Opium Garden complex, and is frequented by A-list celebs with the likes of Paris Hilton.
To prove that He has a cruel sense of humor, God decided to send in a sudden powerful storm surge just as we were walking to Privé. Now people usually make fun of me for carrying around a golf-sized umbrella. Not tonight. I made five new lady-friends under that umbrella when the powerful winds and heavy rain pounded in. The storm, in the end, actually did us a favor, as the small crowd that was building up at the entrance of Privé was scattered, and we actually made it in.
After drying ourselves out and tucking my sopping-wet umbrella under a sofa, we checked out the scene. Fortunately, it was hip-hop night, and the crowd reflected likewise. For a good visual definition of "bling", this homey seated at an alcove sported a diamond-studded cross, where even the chain was loaded with stones.
Then I turned around, and standing behind me, is Kaine from The Ying Yang Twins, parading around, what presumably is, his bitch du jour. (This celebrity sighting probably explains why I had a weird dream that night, where I went on a camping trip with Jack Nicholson. The guy gave me shit all the way.) Before I could gather up the balls to take a picture with him, my classmate's friend, whom I mentioned to be incredibly well-composed after downing eight ouzos, started puking all over the place. Then, he apparently went downstairs to Opium Garden and proceeded to puke some more before going missing. The bouncers weren't too happy, and after hanging around Opium Garden, we went back home.
I have no idea why my classmates always bring in the crazy people to our social functions. Last week, another classmate brought his brother with him on our trip to the beach at Key Biscayne. The guy was really cool, but he got so drunk that he ended up running around a mall without his shirt looking for a place to piss.
But that's another story.
A classmate of mine brought a friend of his along, and the two of them decided to run through the "Ouzo List". For those of you who've been to Opa, on the wall at the back of the place hangs a sign that, just for fun, describes the effect of each subsequent ouzo that you down. From "The first ouzo brings you happiness." to "You better drink the tenth ouzo quickly because the police are coming!" In other words, the two of them are going to try to down TEN shots of ouzo!!
After six shots, my classmate was stumbling around piss-drunk and incessantly dropped cash when the time came for the check (I had no problem with that. He has a job and I don't!). His friend, after eight shots, was unusually well-composed. We left Opa and decided to take our chances getting into Privé, a really posh nightclub which is part of the Opium Garden complex, and is frequented by A-list celebs with the likes of Paris Hilton.
To prove that He has a cruel sense of humor, God decided to send in a sudden powerful storm surge just as we were walking to Privé. Now people usually make fun of me for carrying around a golf-sized umbrella. Not tonight. I made five new lady-friends under that umbrella when the powerful winds and heavy rain pounded in. The storm, in the end, actually did us a favor, as the small crowd that was building up at the entrance of Privé was scattered, and we actually made it in.
After drying ourselves out and tucking my sopping-wet umbrella under a sofa, we checked out the scene. Fortunately, it was hip-hop night, and the crowd reflected likewise. For a good visual definition of "bling", this homey seated at an alcove sported a diamond-studded cross, where even the chain was loaded with stones.
Then I turned around, and standing behind me, is Kaine from The Ying Yang Twins, parading around, what presumably is, his bitch du jour. (This celebrity sighting probably explains why I had a weird dream that night, where I went on a camping trip with Jack Nicholson. The guy gave me shit all the way.) Before I could gather up the balls to take a picture with him, my classmate's friend, whom I mentioned to be incredibly well-composed after downing eight ouzos, started puking all over the place. Then, he apparently went downstairs to Opium Garden and proceeded to puke some more before going missing. The bouncers weren't too happy, and after hanging around Opium Garden, we went back home.
I have no idea why my classmates always bring in the crazy people to our social functions. Last week, another classmate brought his brother with him on our trip to the beach at Key Biscayne. The guy was really cool, but he got so drunk that he ended up running around a mall without his shirt looking for a place to piss.
But that's another story.
posted by Cosmic Ocean at 4:15 PM
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